Restless, Wired, or Always On Edge? What Most People Overlook
Most women I work with aren’t skipping meals on purpose. I see teachers, caregivers, and professionals, all doing “everything right” for everyone else. The day gets swallowed up in meetings, errands, or caring for kids. Before you know it, you’re running on coffee and fumes and wondering why yelling at the dishwasher felt justified.
Your nervous system doesn’t know the difference between “I was too busy to eat” and “food is scarce.” Either way, it interprets those gaps in fuel as a threat. It responds the only way it knows how: by keeping you on high alert. This is why fuel and safety are inseparable for your nervous system.
Your Body Reads Scarcity, Not Intent
Your nervous system’s main job is to keep you alive. It’s always scanning for safety, and one of the biggest red flags it recognizes is scarcity. When blood sugar dips or meals are skipped, the body doesn’t distinguish between missing lunch and famine. Stress hormones surge, your heart rate quickens, your mind spins, and sleep just feels impossible.
Think of meals like logs on a fire. If you wait until the flames die out, you’ll struggle to get them going again. But if you add fuel consistently, the fire burns steady and strong. Your body works the same way. I remind my clients that eating every 3–4 hours isn’t about diet rules or weight loss. It’s about keeping a steady stream of fuel so their nervous system doesn’t have to stay on guard. Over time, this rhythm builds confidence in the body. Researchers call it “metabolic flexibility,” and that confidence is what allows the nervous system to soften.
One of the simplest ways I’ve seen women reset this system is through breakfast. And yes, I know you’ve probably heard me harp on this before. I repeat it because it’s that important. Getting 20–30 grams of protein within the first hour of waking tells your body: we’re resourced, it’s safe to relax.
And it doesn’t need to be complicated or “perfectly healthy.” It could be:
Peanut butter on whole-grain toast with a glass of milk
Cottage cheese with pineapple or peaches
Turkey and cheese roll-ups with apple slices
A breakfast burrito with eggs, beans, and cheese
Leftover chicken or chili from dinner
Food isn’t the only signal your nervous system listens to, either. Calm, gentle movements do the same. A short walk after meals, stretching in the morning, or dancing to a couple of songs in your bathroom while you get ready, all reassure the body: we have energy to spare.
The Everyday Cues That Bring Calm
Once the foundation of steady fuel is there, your nervous system can finally register smaller cues of safety. I call these micro-safety signals, and I’ve seen them make a real difference in the women I work with.
Warmth: a cup of tea, a heated blanket, or sunlight on your skin tells your body it can relax.
Sound: soothing music, laughter, or quiet helps shift you out of high alert.
Touch: a hug, a weighted blanket, or even rubbing your own hands can anchor your system.
Movement: slow, rhythmic activity like walking or swaying reassures your body that life isn’t an emergency. Even swaying in the kitchen while you wait for the microwave counts.
I’ve seen women’s lives change just by bringing these rhythms and signals back in. One client told me that after a few weeks of protein in the morning and shorter gaps between meals, she wasn’t lying awake replaying conversations or spiraling over emails. “I didn’t realize how much energy I was burning just trying to feel okay,” she said. “Now I have that energy back for things that actually matter.”
And because life isn’t always predictable, I encourage women to think in terms of simple, whole foods they can grab when routines fall apart.
If you tend to forget meals, something as basic as a hard-boiled egg, a cheese stick, a handful of roasted chickpeas, or a small bag of nuts and fruit can keep your nervous system steady.
On the road, portable options like clean jerky without added sugar, nut butter with an apple or banana, or even a little homemade trail mix can be enough to reassure your body.
For women watching their budget, staples like eggs, beans, lentils, canned salmon, or even a whole roasted chicken that can stretch across several meals often go further than processed snacks.
And for those with sensitive digestion, gentle choices like homemade smoothies, blended vegetable soups, or soft cheeses with fruit can provide fuel without overwhelm.
The Culture That Keeps Us Depleted
Our culture doesn’t make steady fuel easy. I hear women brag about being “too busy to eat,” or push through a whole day on coffee, because that’s what we’ve been taught to do. We’re praised for ignoring hunger and celebrated for burning out in the name of productivity.
For some women, food rhythms are complicated for even deeper reasons. If you’ve lived through food scarcity, disordered eating, or complicated family dynamics around meals, structure might feel unsafe at first. That response isn’t a failure. It’s your body protecting you. I’ve learned that working with someone who understands food is about more than nutrients can help rebuild trust and safety at your own pace.
Every time you choose steady fuel, you’re pushing back against those pressures. You’re telling your body: my humanity matters more than my productivity.
If this feels overwhelming, don’t overhaul everything at once. Start with one small step:
Eat something protein-rich within an hour of waking.
Don’t let more than 4 hours pass without fuel.
Take a short walk after a meal.
Notice what shifts. Maybe your mood softens, maybe sleep comes easier, maybe you don’t snap at the small things as often.
Calm isn’t just a mindset. It’s a metabolic state.
And one of the simplest ways to care for your nervous system isn’t a wellness retreat. It’s simply feeding it breakfast, lunch, and dinner with the steady fuel it’s been asking for all along.
What might shift for you if your nervous system finally believed it was safe to rest?
